The Aftermath of a Broken Heart
by TLCar1
Summary: Anyone that told you that their first sexual experience was anything but awkward, uncomfortable, and painful lied to you. If they were really lucky like me and they were with a man, not a boy. Then it was only half as painful as the broken heart they left them with because they always leave and it always hurts. This is my tale, through his eyes.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to these characters, only to this story line.

* * *

><p>Note to reader: This story is rated M for graphic topic, graphic language and sexual content. Not advised for children under the age of 18.<p>

* * *

><p>"Anyone that told you that their first sexual experience was anything but awkward, uncomfortable, and painful lied to you. If they were really lucky like me and they were with a man, not a boy. Then it was only half as painful as the broken heart they left them with because they always leave and it always hurts. This is my tale, through his eyes." Elena<p>

**The Aftermath of a Broken Heart**

**Chapter 1**

"Babe, stop wiggling. You've gotta stay still. The more you move, the more I have to work and the more it's going to hurt."

I've been trying to push inside her for the last twenty minutes. She's just too damn tight and every time, I'm able to squeeze in just a little. She scoots her body a little further up the bed.

We've now worked our way from one end of the bed, to the other. With her head dangling of the edge, what's left of the sheets and blankets are clinging to my sweaty lower legs and every inch of my back burns. From where she's digging her nails into my skin every time I get close to pushing inside through that fucking barrier.

To top it off, my dick is so fucking hard that it fucking hurts because it knows better than anyone that once it penetrates that fucking wall there will be nothing but sweet relief. Even with my dick this hard, I can't get out of my head. Every single time she cries out or whimpers in pain, I pull back.

She lets out one last whimper and I'm done. I don't care if my balls feel like they're in my stomach. I can't continue hurting her anymore. Pulling out completely, she lets out another soft whimper. This time I think it's from the loss, not from the pain.

I lay my head against her bare chest and wait for her breathing to even out. "It's okay, Kitten. We'll try again another time." I finally tell her when she seems calm.

"No, please." I don't need to see her face. I can hear the tears in her voice. "Please, it has to be tonight. Please."

She's tugging my face from her chest, lifting my face up to hers. Her eyes closed tight because she knows that if I see the tears, I won't follow through. Her kiss is urgent, needy. Unlike anything she's ever shared with me.

She's scared, scared that something might happen on tomorrow's run. It's not like anything that we've done before but we need a big score because we have a new sheriff that we need to pay off and this is the biggest score out there right now.

But that's not her only fear she's scared that I might dip into some club whore while I'm on the road or that I might claim another old lady before I get the chance to claim her.

The only reason I haven't claimed her as my old lady is because of her pops. He would have my ass if he found out I was banging or trying to bang his underage daughter. It wouldn't matter that him and my pops are best friends. He would bury me. I know it bothers her but I would think that she would understand that even though I haven't claimed her, she's still mine.

It doesn't work that way in our word though. The titles, the labels they're everything. Without it any asshole in the club could try to lay claim to her. Not that they would because her pops would shoot them dead first. But also because both my pops and hers have made it clear that they intend for her to become my brother's old lady.

Not only that but when I'm on the road any president could throw a lady or club whore at me and it'd be rude or disrespectful for me to decline if I'm not attached. Titles and labels are everything.

"Kitten, it's fine. We'll try again when I come back from the run. We'll make a date of it. Dinner, movie, and flowers the whole shebang."

She says nothing, just shakes her head no. Wrapping her legs around my hips, she locks them in place over my hips. Lifting her hips just an inch to meet my still very enlarged and very painful erection. "Just do it. Fast. Hard. Get it over with." It's not meant to be sexy. It's a plea. She's needs this. Not because she's in pain like I am, but she needs it to heal her heart. From everything that she's seen me do, everything that I've done to stay away from her.

"I don't want to hurt you more than I already have." Propped up on my elbows, I run my hands over her damp hair. Kissing her forehead, cheeks, nose, and lips.

"It would hurt me more, if you stopped right now." She presses her palms flat against my back, pulling my chest against hers, digging her nails in slightly. "I'm begging and you know I don't beg for anything." She shakes her head against the pillow. "I don't beg and I'm begging for you. Please Damon. Be with me. Let me give myself to you."

"Fuck," I growl and I'm kissing her like she was kissing me earlier. Lips, tongue, teeth. After what she just said I need her just as much as she needs me. If not more.

"Bite down on my chest, hard. I want you to hurt me as much as I hurt you."

She nods her head and I say repeat the words, "Okay." It's breathy, airy and I know that I have to do this for her.

She takes the cliff of my chest, right at the breast bone and suckles it lightly. Caressing it first with her lips, then her tongue and now her teeth. Once I feel her bite down fully, I push inside her in one clean full push.

She doesn't continue to bite down. Instead she lets out a wail of a cry. Her mouths open wide, her back arching off the bed. Her cry goes silent but I can see the pain all over her face.

"Fuck! Babe, I'm sorry." I'm back on my elbows cooing her, caressing her cheek, her hair and her face. "I'm so sorry, Kitten. If I could take it back I would. I didn't need this. I don't need this. I just need you." I no longer know what I'm saying. All I know is that I want to take back the pain that I've just caused her. I start to pull out, when she stops me.

"Don't," she pleads. Tightening her hold on my hips, she pulls me in a litter further. "Please, don't."

"Babe, I can't. You're in pain. You're crying. I can't, we'll try again when I get back. The hard part is over. It will be better next time." Now it's me pleading with her.

"Please, finish. I need to know that I can please you." Her breath catches, almost like a child who's been crying. "Like you said, it will be better next time. Right now, I need to know that I was enough. That I am enough."

It hurts to look into the pools that have collected on the rims of her brown doe eyes. I can see the pain, feel the pain. Not just the pain from tonight, but from the entire time that we've been consumed with each other.

"Elena….Kitten, you please me every day without any of this."

I move a little to pull out, but with the grip she has on my hips and how tight her inside are clamped down around on me, all I can do is let out a moan. "Please," she moans alone with me. Doing her best to be brave and sexy, which she doesn't need help with because she's sexy as hell. She arches her back off the bed, pushing her head back into the pillow, while raising her breast to me. "Please," she moans again.

She's so fucking tight and I'm so fucking hard, I don't even think that I'd have to move to climax. Her body is covered in sweat, her hair damp and sticking to her face. She has still never looked hotter to me.

"I'm not going to be able to make you come, Elena. I'm too afraid to hurt you." I run my hand down her moist body. "But next time I promise." Her only answer a soft moan and a lift of her hips. Her eyes are closed tight and her lip is tucked tightly in-between her teeth. I can see she's still uncomfortable. "This is you Kitten. You have to control it." Slipping my hand under her hip, I lift just a little. "That's it." Fuck, if she only knew how fucking good it feels to be inside her tight little pussy, If only I could make her feel just as good right now. "Move your hips, this is you. Make me come."

Lowering my head to the nip of her neck, I come. It's not explosive. It's nothing like I'm use to but the release feels good.

"Thank you." Elena says, kissing the shell of my ear.

I pull out of her, rising to my elbows. I laugh, a little. "For what?"

"For being me first," she states. Her eyes are beaming. Her face is radiant, every ounce of pain gone. It might not have been the best sex in the world but she's happy with it.

"Your only," I tell her matter of factly. I kiss her quickly on the lips before rolling off her. Propped on the edge of the bed, I snap the condom off. "Shit!" I spat, louder and harsher than I expected to.

"What? What's wrong?"

I pick up my phone quickly and act like I have a text or a missed call. Before tossing the condom in the trash can.

"You have to go?" She asks.

I don't want to tell her yes. I wanted to stay and snuggle with her. That really all I wanted to do tonight. I could have done without all this other crap. But I'm instantly freaking out and I feel the need to run. "Yeah, club business." I can't even look back at her. "You should shower and change the sheets. Every thing's going to be sticky, messy and I'm sure there's blood on the sheets. Don't want your pops to see it."

I can feel her gaze on me. "Want to grab a shower with me before you head out?" I can hear it in her voice, she knows I'm going to say no before I even answer.

"Na, sorry gotta go. Don't want to keep my pops waiting." I grab my jeans from beside the bed and tug them on without even a backward glance at her. I don't know what I'm doing but I do know that I'm fucking everything up.

I'll fix it when I come back from the run. I'll make love to her the right way. I'll tell her pops. I'll claim her as my lady. I'll make everything right. Next time, because there will be a next time. Won't there?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to these characters, only to this story line.

* * *

><p>Note to readers: This story is rated M for graphic topic, langue, and sexual content. Not advised for anyone under the age of 18.<p>

* * *

><p>"They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Well, I know for sure it diffidently made me harder. But then they also say that absence makes the heart grows fonder. I guess we're about to find out." Elena<p>

**The Aftermath of a Broken Heart**

**Chapter 2**

No, no, no. This is not happening. I have some half-naked skank draped all over me. In nothing more than high heels, a headband for a skirt and a leopard bra, when she walks through the front door of the club. I haven't seen her in almost 7 years and she has to choice this moment to make her triumphant return.

I'm doing the best I can to act like I don't see her standing at the end of the bar with Jackson's arms wrapped snuggly around her trim waist. He leans in and kisses her cheek and I'm boiling. I'd heard rumors that they had become close while I was away but I had yet to see it with my own two eyes. Since it seemed that the moment I reclaimed Imperial Country as my home, she up and relocated.

Jackson hands her a beer and takes up a seat at the bar, where she joins him. His fucking longer brown hair dropping in front of his face and Elena sweeps it out of the way. I can hear his raspy laugh over here. What could she being saying to make him laugh like that? They haven't seen each other in at least 5 or 6 years.

The girl on my lap is still grinding, pumping, and moving all over me but she's doing nothing for me. I can't take my eyes off of Elena and Jackson. I need to know why she's here.

"Lena!" I hear my shit head brother's voice from the other side of the club and if my blood wasn't boiling before, it's boiling now.

"Sal," she sets her beer down, jumping from her seat and straight into his arms. I mean fucking leaping. Legs wrapped around his waist, head nested on his shoulder. Like he's her favorite person in the whole fucking world. What the fuck is that. I mean Elena tolerated Stefan before but they were never that fucking close. No matter how much our fathers insisted that they were meant to be together, like MC royalty.

Stefan finally drops her back on her feet and I get a full look at her. She's let her hair grow out long. it's un-kept and wild like she just pulled it out of a helmet. I look quickly around the room for anyone that she could have rode in with but I don't see anyone from out of county.

Her waist is tiny, to tiny like she could use a good club dinner, but then her ass is full and round and you know that she's not missing out on any meals. Where's the kid that I left behind and when did she transform into this beautiful woman.

I eye the assholes standing around gawking at her, while she chats with my asshole brother and never before have I ever wanted to call each and every one of my brothers out to the pit so badly before. What the fuck where they looking at? Haven't they ever seen a chick before? I mean come on, we have half-naked chicks waking around here all day and they don't gawk at them they they're gawking at her.

"Fuck," the word flies from my mouth when her eyes meet mine. Gone is the round baby face that I loved so much. Instead I'm met by the hard sculpted face, chiseled cheeks and eyes still round as a doe but filled by life's hardness. When her eyes move from me to the blond bumping and grinding all over me I want to die.

"I know," the girl whispers against my neck. She must have assumed that my groaned fuck is directed towards her.

Elena's drops her gaze as quickly as it found me.

"Damn." I allow my head to roll back against the chair and I stare at the ceiling.

"I know, I want you too," the girl whispers and licks my neck. "Let's go up to your room." She continues.

I have no clue what the fuck to do. Everything inside me is telling me to push this skank off me and run up to Elena and explain to her that this bitch means nothing to me. That none of them have meant anything to me, only her. But what right do I have? What good would that do? Will it erase the last seven years?

I decide on the lateral. I push the bitch off my lap but don't move.

"What the fuck baby?" The girl looks up at me from the floor, puzzled.

"Move the fuck on, it ain't gonna happen." I tell her, shoeing her away. It's too late, because Elena's gone and so is my shit head brother.

I need a drink and it needs to be something stronger than this shit beer that's plastered to my hand right now. I know I shouldn't drink anything harder because I have to make a crap money run tonight but if I don't clear the Elena from my head. I'm going to be a worthless piece of shit, anyways.

The moment I reach the bar and the bottle of scotch, she comes barreling out of her father's office, with Stefan right by her side.

"Hey," I manage to get out before she can walk away. She's standing right in front of me. I have to say something to her.

"Sal, I'll see you next week?" She asks Stefan, not even acknowledging me.

"For sure, doll." He tells her and kisses her cheek. His hand is on her hip and it's driving me crazy. I don't care that he's my brother. I want to break every one of his fingers right now. And what's this about next week? Has he been seeing her all along?

I'm so wrapped up in my head, I don't notice that he's pulled away from her and is standing directly in front of me. "Don't piss her off bro. She's not as easy to calm down as she used to be." He steps away from me and kisses her cheek one more time before heading out of the club.

"Sal, really? Since when do you go around coming Stefan, Sal?"

"That's his name." She picks up the beer that she had left behind and is about to take a swig when she has a second thought. She sets it back on the bar and starts to walk away.

"Aren't you a long way from home, Kitten?" I grit my teeth when her old pet name leaves my mouth.

She stays were she's at, sure to keep some distance between us. "Shit, Crow. No matter where they send my mail, this will always be home." She gazes around the club. It's filled with plenty of faces that she knows and plenty that she doesn't. The whores have changed but the men are all the same just older, dirtier.

"It was nice seeing you again, Crow." Her voice low, a tell tale that she wants to say more, but we both know she won't.

"That's it. You practically jump into Stefan's arms. You give Jackson a hug and a kiss like you guys are long last friends and all I get is. Hey crow, nice seeing you." I'm pissed, I step closer and I know I shouldn't. I call feel everyone's eyes on us. "And Crow. Really when have you ever fucking called me Crow?"

She takes a retreating step, making up for the space that I just took up when I moved in closer. "I don't know what else you expect me to say to you. I mean I've seen Sal and Toker more than once in the last six years."

"Seven, it's been seven years."

"Maybe for you." Her eyes drop to the floor, like she knows something that I don't.

I don't know what's she's keeping from me but I do know I'm too pissed to find out and the more that I feel everyone staring at us the more infuriated I'm becoming. "Come on babe, let's go someplace private and talk."

"No, I don't think so. The club is family, there's' no secrets here." She raises her voice just a notch louder. She's testing me. She knows that I'm the VP since my pops died and that it's a sign of disrespect for her to be talking to me this way. No matter whom her father is. She has no ranking here. Females really hold no place with the MC without an old man. Her father can protect her but that's about it.

"We have a fucking kid together." I shout. I'm pissed now. I can't believe she's forcing my hand and making me discuss it like this.

"No, I have a fucking kid. You and I fucked once, once. I wasn't your old lady. I wasn't anything to you." I wish I could tell her that that's not true. That she was everything to me. I don't do it though.

"Bullshit!" I pull out my phone, tossing it on the counter. A picture of our daughter on my lock screen. "Tell me that little girl ain't mine."

I unlock the screen and open the gallery folder filled with pictures of Raven. I toss the phone back at Elena. "Everybody get the fuck out. Now!" I shout at the room full of riders and clubs whores. Everyone scurries to leave the club, I turn tell her.

"Where'd you get these?" She flips through picture after picture, going all the way back to when Raven was an infant. I can't answer her. I can't tell her the truth.

She tosses the phone back down on the bar, she scrolled into another folder that she shouldn't have. An almost completely naked brunette laid out in a provocative pose, nothing but my Kings VP cut on. I haven't changed. She doesn't need to see my phone to know it. She saw it when she walked in the club and I had a half-naked chick draped all over me.

"This doesn't matter." I bang my finger against my phone, pointing at the brunette. "That little girl is mine and no matter who I fuck today tomorrow or next week. It's not going to change that."

Elena doesn't look back up at me. She turns on her heels and makes her way through the front door of the club. By the time it registers that she just walked out on me and I have no clue where to find her. I'm chasing after her. She's on the back of a blue sports bike that we Kings wouldn't be caught dead on. "I want to see her!" I shout over the sound of the sports bike.

I don't know why I did it, or why I said it. I know I promised her father all those years ago that I'd stay away from both of them but I just felt I needed to push her a little bit. It got me nowhere. Elena tugged on her blue sporty bike helmet, pulled back on the throttle, spun the tires and left nothing but tire tracks in her wake.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of these characters, only to this story line.

* * *

><p>Note to readers: This story is rated R for graphic langue, topic and sexual content. Not advised for anyone under the age of 18.<p>

* * *

><p>"Shatter me into a million pieces and when you put me back together. Don't expect me to be whole again." Elena<p>

**_The Aftermath of a Broken Heart_**

**_Chapter 3_**

I'm standing in the doorway of the club, watching her speed away. I don't need to turn around to know he's standing behind me I can feel him breathing down my neck.

"What the fuck Crow? I thought we had agreed that you'd stay the fuck away from her." John's shouting in my face, the instant that my body turns towards him. Only inches away from me, if he was anyone else, I'd have ripped his tongue out and shoved it down his throat. But he's my MC's President and he's her father. He has every right to be pissed.

"It's not like I fucking went looking for her. She practically walked in my front door. In fact she did walk through my front door. What was I supposed to do, act like she wasn't there? Like I didn't see her standing right next to me?"

"You didn't have to announce to her that you knew about Raven. She's going to know that that shit came from me." You've never truly seen the look of fear until you see it on a father's face in regards to his daughter. Right now John looks like he'll soon be facing the firing squad when Elena gets a hold of him. "Just keep your promise and stay away from her."

I still can't believe that I made that deal all those years ago, before I even got a glimpse of my baby girl. John was so pissed that I had knocked up his 17 year old daughter. He didn't have to tell me twice. I knew it was true when he came to the jail and told me. I couldn't deny it.

I fucked up that night. I should have warned Elena. I should have told you that the rubber busted. I thought I'd get away. I didn't think that the one time I fucked up. I would knock her up, especially on the first try.

In that moment I not only made him a grandpa, but I made his 17 year old baby girl look like just another club whore. He had every right to want to murder me. Hine sight, if someone pulls that shit with my daughter. I wouldn't think twice about putting a bullet in their head and burying them in a road side ditch.

So, John and my pops made me choose the club or Elena and my baby. Was never much of a choice. If I had thought I could have Elena and a life outside of the MC. I would have chosen her hands down. Had I thought for a minute that John would let me walk away with my life, I would have chosen her. I knew that would never happen though.

The moment I was a free man, my freedom was virtually ripped away from me. Sent to Nevada to help with some issues they were having with a defective President that wasn't happy with a patch over that occurred under his watch. That's where I remained until my pops died, a year later.

"Why was she here?" I had to ask. She hasn't shown her face once in the 5 or so years since I've been back. What would make her show up out of the blue? "Is she back? Is Raven in Imperial County?"

"No, she's not back." He rolled his eyes at me. "And if she was your ass would be on the back of that bike, going straight across state lines."

"Look I get it." I shout, slamming my fist and head against the door frame. "I fucking get it. She's better off without me. This is no life for Elena or Raven. I get it. It still doesn't make it hurt any less."

"Raven's birthday party is next weekend. She wanted to make sure that I was coming." Baring his teeth at me, like that was the hardest bit of information in the word for him to give me. Not like he had to remind me that Raven's birthday was this week.

"So, Elena drove all the way out here," I'm trying to gage his reaction to how far all the way really is. "On a bike…. You let her ride that shit?" Shocked that he would let her ride that crap, let alone ride that crap all the way to Imperial County.

"One, you don't let Elena do anything. She does what she wants. Two, It's not as far of a ride as I'd like it to be. And yes, I didn't answer the hundreds of calls and text from her and her mother. So, she decided to show up here."

The only thing that registered from all of that for me is that, it's not as far as he'd like it to be. Has Elena been within reach this whole time?

"Whatever you thinking, don't. She's happy."

"She seeing someone?"

"She's been with Alex for a while now. It's complicated, but she's happy with her life. She has school, she's working and she has Raven."

"And she has Alex." Never met the guy and I'm already choking on the name.

John shakes his head. "7 years, 7 fucking years and you're still hard for my daughter." John steps back into my space. He's an old man now, he always has been. I could take him if I wanted to. But, I'd have the raft of the MC on my ass if I did. So, I step back.

"She's your fucking Daughter John. You'd think it'd make you happy that I'm still falling all over her."

"That doesn't stop you from sticking it in every club whore that opens her legs to you and it didn't stop you from giving her up for the club."

He's right about no matter how I say I feel about Elena. When she was here and now that she's gone, those feelings never stopped me from fucking everything that walked up right. Except her, I never wanted any of that from her. I just wanted her, like I didn't want to dirty her with all that crap.

Maybe it was just this shitty club life. I'd never seen anyone stay faithful to their old ladies. They all fucked around. Even my pops, would fuck other bitches right under my nose when my Ma was alive. The MC has a code. What happens on the road stays on the road. As long as we don't bring that shit back home.

As far as the club goes, that I never thought I had a choice in, "Like I had a choice. Even if I had picked Elena, I would have been a dead man." I said matter-of-factly to John.

"Your father and the club would have never gone alone with me offing you for knocking up my daughter. No matter how pissed off I was about it."

"Accidents happen, like a mysterious hit and run in the middle of nowhere." I knew what I was doing. I'd been calling him out on this shit for years. None of it ever seemed right and the MC has so many pigs in its pocket. You never know what reports are true and what reports aren't.

"Watch it Crow. Your father was my best friend and a founding member of club. Keep throwing those accusations out there and it won't fare in your favor."

"Just saying, it's amazing that a seasoned rider like my pops, riding shoot gun with only you. Was killed by a hit and run driver and the only detail you got was it was a blue minivan. I've seen this MC, find a needle in a haystack but you couldn't find the mother fucker that ran my pops of the road. When you were right fucken there, witness to the whole thing."

"I had nothing to gain from your father's death. If I remember correctly, the only person that benefited from his death was you."

"Whatever." I grab a bottle of Jack from behind the bar and head for the stairs. "Send Toker on the run with Sal. I don't think my head is clear enough go even get on my bike right now."

"Just stay away from her Crow!" John shouts at me.

I raise my hand in the air, alone with my bottle of Jack. "Don't even know where she's at John."

Half a bottle deep, my phone pings with a text message from a number I don't recognize.

_**1272 Reaching Way, San Diego**_

I don't respond, with all the shit that my MC is wrapped up in. I don't know who this is or what it's linked to. It could be the FED's for all I know.

Ten minutes later another text.

_**Don't tell my father.**_

A few seconds later, I get another text.

_**Be here Monday at noon to see Raven.**_

Fucking shit its Elena and my fingers won't respond because my brain is too fucked up to function because of the simple fact that she's texting me right now.

My phone pings with another text.

**_If you don't show, don't ever ask to see her again._**

Without another moment's hesitation, my fingers are sweeping across my keypad.

_**I'll be there.**_

I wait but she doesn't respond back.

I shoot her another text.

**_Thank you._**

Within moments, she responds.

_**I'm not doing it for you and don't thank me yet.**_

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><p>Okay, some notes to those reviews who are guest and I can't respond to. No I've never read that book. I'll be sure to pick it up once I'm done writing this. I'm trying not to read anything right now because I don't want it to sway the direction of this series. Yes, I said series and no, this will not be a complete Elena, Damon Series. This story will end and someone else's story will pick up.<p>

As far as Track of my Tears. That story will be updated this after noon. That story is a little harder to update. A lot of research for that story and it's still being written. As for The Aftermath of a Broken Heart, this story is pretty much written. I just have to type it out because when I write, I write by hand. I just seem to get a better flow that way.

Well, thank you to everyone that has checked out both stories. I know MC stories aren't for everyone but I'm obsessed. Also please be kind, the "L" on my laptop is crap and doesn't always work. And I'm always looking for a beta.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to any of these characters, only to this story line.

* * *

><p>Note to readers: This story is rated M for strong adult content, graphic langue and graphic topic. Not recommended for anyone under the age of 18.<p>

* * *

><p>"If you gave me wings and told me I could fly anywhere. I'd fly straight to you. For even if you're the flame that will burn my wings, as long as I feel the burn. I know I'm free." Elena<p>

_**The Aftermath of a Broken Heart**_

_**Chapter 4**_

I woke with the sun. Not that I slept much last night or since I received the text from Elena. I wanted to make sure that my ride into San Diego went off without a hitch. Never sure what problems I might run into on the road. I wanted to make sure I gave myself enough time for a successful ride. I should have known that with my luck that something would go awry.

I grab my cut and head for the door. My hand fisted around the handle and I'm second guessing myself, for the first time ever. Never once in all my time as a member of the MC have I thought twice about wearing my cut. I've always wore it with pride. It's like a second layer of skin. I ran over the scenario in my head. For the first time it felt wrong.

Taking two steps back, grabbing my old leather jacket off the back of my chair. I don't know what time I'll be heading back and it might get chilly. It's the lie I tell myself so am able to make it through the door, knowing that I intend to remove or cover my cut when I get there.

I make it as far as the bike garage. John, Sal and one of the newer prospects Maze are parking their bikes. Damn it, I thought they would be out-of-town until later tonight.

"Hey Crow. We were just coming to meet with you."

"Looks like I saved you a trip." I smirk, but I really want to cut the BS and leave as quickly as possible.

"We've got church in 30 minutes; need to discuss something's that developed while we were gone."

"No can do John, I didn't think you'd be back till later tonight. I've got mine own things to take care of today." Church is never quick and simple, not anymore. The way the club has been so divided lately, church could go on for hours.

We have the new crew members who don't click with the old crew members, the transfers who think they're better than the vet that have been with Imperial County Kings from day one and then you have John and I. No matter where we stand when it comes to Elena and I. When it comes to the club John and I always see eye to eye, we both want the same thing for the MC and its members.

It's Sal and the younger guys that think the club needs to go in a new direction, become more legit. Focus less on the illegal aspects of the MC business and more on the legal aspects.

Today, I just don't have time for this fight. Even if we could get through church in record time, I'd still have to push it to get to San Diego. Hoping for no other road blocks, not to mention that I'm not on everyone's friends with benefits list and I'll be traveling alone without my right hand man, Enzo. This means no speeding because I'm diffidently packing more than the fuzzy bunny for Raven, in my saddle bag.

"If it ain't club business it can wait." John informs me, walking away before I can even respond.

"Sorry, it can't." I yell over my shoulder, tossing my leather jacket into my saddle bag.

"Long ride, Crow?" my asshat for a brother Sal asks.

I eyeball him so hard; I think my head might pop. Fucking Asshole couldn't just walk away and let me slide for once.

"None of your god damn business!" I toss my leg over the side of my bike, kick up the kick stand and push it backwards. "Nice to know you've always got my back brother." I tell Sal leaning in close enough so that only he would hear me. "Give Teach my proxy." I shout as I kick-start my bike.

Sal and John are talking at the door of the Club. I see John wave prospect Maze. Fucking dickhead Sal opened his mouth. Now, John is going to have this fucking prospect follow me, great.

I act like I don't see them or I plan and simple don't give a shit. I don't wait for Maze to make it to the Bike garage before I'm darting in front of a truck and trying to loss him before we make it on to the main road.

Harley's are never the way to tail someone, especially in a small town like Imperial County. They're loud, you can't blend and the only people that ride are from our MC. Within minutes of hitting the open road I can hear Maze's bike following far enough behind me, but I'm not stupid I know he's there. When I think that we're far enough away from the club I pull over on the side of the road and wait.

Maze does the same but further down the road. I check my watch; this shit is already taking up far too much of my time. I park my bike and hop off, marching towards Maze.

"Oh, hey," he says, doing his best to play it cool, like he just happen to be sitting on the same street as me.

"Look, dick wad. I don't have time for this shit today. I know John sent you to babysit me. Just tell the fucker I lost you or something and get the fuck back home. Before I have to do something to you that I really don't want to do, to make sure that you stay put." I tell him taking a couple of steps into his personal space.

"Dude," he puts his hands up in the air. "Crow, I can't do that. John will have my ass. I'll never get patched in."

I stared at the fucker for a minute. I really didn't want to hurt him. He was a future brother, but he was cutting into my travel time and Elena said if I didn't show to never ask again. "Look, go grab a club whore or even better yet." I reach into my pocket and Maze jumps back. I slowly pull out my hand, showing mine the wad of cash. "Go get a real whore, one of them girl down off of the 52. You know the place Iggy's. Get yourself a girl." I shove a hand full of money into his cut pocket. "No get yourself two girls," I push a little more money into his cut. "That doesn't say no to anything."

I pull away from him tugging gently on his cut. "Fuck them for a couple of hours. Go to a bar, get piss drunk. I don't give a fuck what you do. Just tell John I went to my mom's grave, drank and then went to visit some shank and never came back out."

"He's the Prez man. I can't lie to him."

That's it; I don't have time to play nice anymore. Grabbing him by his cut, I push him against his back. "And I'm the fucking VP. By the time your ass gets patched in I'll be the one running shit. Do you really want to be on my shit list when that happens?"

"Na man."

"I didn't think so. Now, do what the fuck I told you to do and get the fuck out of here." I shove him against his bike knocking both him and his bike over.

I jump on my bike, I'm in the clear. No more detours next stop, San Diego.

* * *

><p><strong>Sorry, I know it's been a few weeks. Troubles with my computer, L doesn't work all the time and it was frustrating the crap out of me. But he's a quick update for you. And just an FYI, if you look at the cover for my story, that's my grandpa. Sometimes fiction is a little real.<strong>


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